Trick Me, Treat Me
by GeminiScar
Summary: AU Halloween Oneshot. Sasuke has a crush on his Older Brother's best friend Naruto. Only Problem is Itachi knows it, but what Sasuke seems to have forgotten is that Itachi will do anything for his little brother, and for his best friend at that.RATED MA


**A.N. So, here is my Halloween special! ^-^ I had this idea back in 'A' School nearly three years ago, and I am just now putting it down and posting it. Yeah I procrastinate. I hope everyone likes this as much as I enjoyed writing it. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything in regards to the Naruto franchise. They belong to Mashashi Kishimoto. This is just non-profitable fun.**

**WARNING: THIS IS RATED 'M' BECAUSE THERE IS SMUT! SEX BETWEEN TWO BOYS! GRAPHIC, UNEDITED SEX! Okay, hope you all got that. If this is not your cup of tea don't read it. If you don't like Yaoi, please leave now, if you do not like graphic sex why are you in the 'M' rated section at all? That is all.**

**Trick Me, Treat Me**

It was the bright grin on Itachi's face, which met him when he'd entered the house—school bag slipping from one shoulder as he attempted to remove his shoes—that made him wary.

Itachi never grinned. Hell, Sasuke was certain that his older brother was born with that placid face etched from marble. The perfect image of an Uchiha, one that often made his parents squirm in their seats before the Christmas tree as the boy opened presents.

So when the other did smile it usually preceded some world catastrophe. Like, the Dark Ages, Noah's flood, the ice age, the stock market crash, and the destruction of Atlantis being but a few.

"Sasuke." Itachi practically purred his name, and Sasuke was vividly reminded of the time he'd been convinced that trying to fly from the roof of his grandparent's summer home with cardboard wings would work. He'd been in casts for nearly six months after that, and his brother wasn't aloud alone in a room with him for nearly two years. _Why did Mom and Dad think it was okay to just up and leave for Europe? They're secretly trying to kill me… I just know it._ Sasuke scowled and ripped his shoe off harshly.

"What?" Sasuke snapped, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. Last time he'd seen that grin had been when Itachi had walked in on him at their grandparent's house when he'd been relieving some tension. _If I'm fucked up later in life it's his fault for traumatizing me in my early stages of puberty…_ Sasuke thought darkly reminded of the horrifying way in which Itachi had sing-songed the name Sasuke had been moaning.

_Fuck… why'd it have to be him? I would have taken being caught by mom any day over Itachi…_ Sasuke fought down a blush when Itachi's grin only widened showing more teeth.

"Are you having a heart attack?"

Itachi snickered, sounding dark and evil, and Sasuke was further reminded of younger years when his brother had held him down and tickled him till he'd wet himself.

His brother was an ass-hole.

The ass-hole.

Itachi was the ass-hole of ass-holes, and the prick knew what Sasuke's perverted little teenage body wanted. What he could never have because of a four year age difference.

"Silly little brother, is that anyway to treat the one who so graciously took the day off to accompany you and your friends while you go trick-or-treating?"

Sasuke lifted a dark eyebrow, feeling his bag slip to fall to the floor of the landing. How had he found out? Sasuke was torn between being mortified—because he was in high school, far too old to be dressing up and asking for candy—or pissed off because of the reasons he'd been forced to go.

"…What are you talking about?" Sasuke tried to brush it off, his gaze level and face a perfect Noh mask, but trying to fool Itachi was like trying to swindle the Devil.

It just didn't work.

Itachi's smile reappeared as he pulled out something from the seat beside him. "Oh, then this is not a costume then."

Sasuke paled and then flushed crimson in seconds at the tight pleather hot-shorts with the bendable black tail, the matching fishnet top, black collar—complete with bell—and the black cat ears in his brother's hands. He just _knew _the zip-up thigh-highs would also be there.

"… so, is this a kink you have little brother?" Itachi was just loving this, "…and should I be worried?"

_Damn you Kiba… damn you to hell! I hope your dick rots off and you die an unfulfilled virgin you son-of-a-bitch!_ Sasuke mentally cursed his friend for the stupid dare and wished for the hundredth time that he had been an only child.

The long-haired teen, dressed smartly in denim jeans and a blue pin-striped button-down shirt, seemed to take Sasuke's silence as an answer. "Well, then, perhaps you should try it out tonight. Naruto's helping me to pass out candy since Mom and Dad are away."

Sasuke's spine stiffened and he looked up, eyes filled with both hope and horror. "…I thought you were going to take me—"

Itachi chuckled standing up and striding over to lean against the wall beside Sasuke, hands in his pockets looking down at him with warm regard. "I think we both know you are old enough to go out by yourself Sasuke."

Sasuke frowned and turned away yanking his remaining shoe off and shoving passed his older brother, his goal; the stairs. "Fuck you."

"That would be interesting, though I'm not really into incest or cute kitty cosplay."

Sasuke ground his back teeth and clenched his hands by his sides. _That's it, just wait Itachi… I'm so putting hydrogen peroxide in your shampoo tonight._

Sasuke knew he was acting childish but couldn't refrain from stomping his feet as he ascended the stairs. "… though you know…" Itachi's voice trailed after him like some sick conscience. Sasuke didn't want to hear it and yet, couldn't stop listening all the same. "Naruto has a weak spot for cats. Little black ones."

Sasuke froze for a moment, hot little cinder butterflies dancing through his lower belly. He swallowed at the humiliating, but very arousing images that graced his mind at the thought of being Naruto's kitten.

Sasuke ran up the last few steps and bolted to his room, slamming the door harshly against his brother's words. His stomach was already tight and hot, throbbing with his heartbeat and desire. "Damn it…" Sasuke leaned against his door and fisted the front of his school uniform. He wanted to be angry, but his hormones only allowed for lust and hope to enter his mind at the thought that Naruto might see him in his costume. That Naruto might like his costume.

Because even if there was a four year age difference, Sasuke just couldn't help himself. He was crazy in love, and more than crazy in lust, for his brother's best friend. The blond idiot that had basically been part of their family his whole life. He'd been Sasuke's baby sitter during the years that Itachi was not allowed to be alone with him, and Sasuke could vaguely recall taking bathes with the older boy when he'd been very small.

"Uzumaki Naruto…" Sasuke whispered and shuddered closing his eyes. He knew it was wrong, Naruto was almost like another older brother, and yet Sasuke couldn't help but tremble inside as suddenly, Kiba's dare to dress up like an S&M Sex Kitten, wasn't sounding so bad.

_Maybe Naruto will feel the urge to pet me. _Sasuke opened his eyes at his absurd thought as the image—that should have been erotic—of Naruto laughing and patting his head like the proper big brother came to mind. Sasuke glowered about the room and frowned. _I am such a loser._

As always his eyes drew up and to the window in his room. He had a clear view of the side of the beige house next door. The cream colored siding and redish-brown roof made the house look quite plain, and Sasuke would have never guessed that the obnoxious blond lived there if he didn't have a view of the window with the neon orange curtains.

Sasuke had always hated the color orange. He detested it and thought that anyone who liked it or the fruit and flavor were stupid and very un classy. It was a stigma he'd held to until one blond boy moved in next door.

Naruto loved orange.

It was his favorite color, fruit and taste, and over the years Sasuke had found himself choking down the stuff—mainly sherbet—just to prove to the blond that he could and would beat him. Sasuke felt himself smile a little as he watched the curtain sway with the chill breeze.

Naruto may have liked orange, but he hated the cold, yet always left his window open for Sasuke. At one time they had made a telephone out of cans and yarn. It had started shortly after he'd met Itachi and was thus introduced to Sasuke. Sasuke, who at the time would have slit his writs for his brother, felt that Naruto was infringing on his time with his big brother—sadist or not, the love and adornment of a little brother to an older brother was strong—and had made Naruto his rival.

And rival's had to make sure creatures of the undead didn't kill them in their sleep.

Thus the "phones."

Naruto had moved in next door just days after Sasuke's sixth birthday. Before him it had been a really creepy scientist who rarely came out. Itachi had told him that the man was a vampire, and that was why he had yellow eyes and pasty white skin.

Sasuke had believed Itachi and had nearly pissed himself when he'd been caught by Orochimaru when he snuck into the basement to find his coffin. The man had yelled and came flying at him so quickly, Sasuke was certain he was going to die. So he did just what Itachi had taught him to do, he kicked the man in the privates and ran away.

It was only afterwards that he discovered that Orochimaru kept many snakes in his basement, and his favorite Asp had gotten loose earlier that day. Sasuke was unrepentive and refused to apologize to the man. From that point on Orochimaru seemed to watch him all the time sending him evil grins full of promises of pain. When Orochimaru vanished Sasuke was certain he'd just gone to sleep for a while since Itachi—the stupid prick—didn't bother to tell him the man had moved. So, when Naruto moved in, alone since his parents had died years before and his grandparents liked to travel, Sasuke was naturally worried.

Sasuke felt his cheeks redden at his childish actions, but one side of his mouth tilted up in a soft half-smile. Naruto had been so kind to him, just playing along, and even now, though they both knew there was no snake-vampire's in the basement, Naruto left his window open, just for him.

The warm bubble was promptly burst as he forced himself to recall why Naruto was so kind to him. The blonde had no family, so it only made sense that he would seek one out in the Uchiha's. Itachi was his best friend and confidant, and Sasuke, was his cute little brother.

That just sucked.

_Damn it, we're not even blood related and I'm still trapped in the tangled web of incest! What the fuck!_ Sasuke's mood darkened as he turned and flopped back onto his bed to stare up at his ceiling. Green paint flecks stared down on him from the time he and Sai got into a fight over their science project and spilled glow in the dark paint all over his carpet, and in the scuffle that followed, somehow got it up on the ceiling as well.

If Itachi ever wondered why the underside of Sasuke's bed glowed ominously like something from _The X-Files_ he never asked. He'd always wondered exactly how the paint had gotten up on the ceiling, but didn't mind as it kind of looked like stars at night. Of course, Naruto had been the one to point that out to him.

Letting out a sigh, Sasuke rolled to his side, pushing thoughts of his cousin and Naruto far from his mind.

Or trying to at least.

Was it normal to love someone so close to you? It seemed that every little thing around him, reminded Sasuke of Naruto, everything in his room could always be tied back to the blonde. Shouldn't that be annoying? Shouldn't that make this feeling wrong? Perversely, he just wanted it more because of it.

Sasuke sighed feeling forlorn and rather tired. He loved that stupid blonde, had for years, and now that he was acutely aware of just what a relationship with the other would entail he'd found no way to express himself.

It wasn't fear per-say so much as apprehension. Naruto was starting college this year. What were his chances of honestly appealing to him? He was four years his junior and Itachi's younger brother. Sasuke was certain that even if Naruto could overlook the age difference that last fact would work against him. _Damn it! If Itachi hadn't told me Naruto's preferences, this wouldn't be a problem now._ Sasuke thought glumly.

Sasuke had, himself, been in denial about his feelings and when the first few dreams had started he'd blamed Naruto. He threw away the tin-can and string phone that connected their rooms and proceeded to treat Naruto like a leper.

Thirteen had been a rough year.

Naruto had come over a night not too long after the "phone incident"—they still didn't talk about it or the things he'd screamed as he cut the string cord and threw the tin can as far from his window as possible—and he and Itachi proceeded to get smashed. Sasuke had immediately attempted to escape into his bedroom, vividly recalling the last time the two had gotten wasted. They had proceeded to hold Sasuke down while they dressed him in drag and then had a photo shoot.

Some of those photos were still on Itachi's Facebook.

Sasuke made a mental note to ask Shikamaru if he'd finished creating the computer virus he'd promised him.

That aside, Sasuke had left the two teens to their drunken stupidities not fancying a repeat adventure in women's clothing, and had planned to surf the net until Naruto accused him of downloading porn. Several boring hours later Sasuke ventured down to the den for a cola—it was well past three in the morning and he had thought the two would be in an alcoholic coma by now—and was shocked to find his brother still awake and sober with a sleeping Naruto in his lap. It looked like the blonde had been crying.

His concern must have shown on his face at the time, because Itachi looked up at him, his expression unreadable and unnerving but began to explain. The determination in his eyes—red due to colored contacts, his brother was going through an odd phase; Sasuke didn't even want to think about the dark purple nail polish—was like steel and made Sasuke apprehensive and awkward. Itachi showed more loyalty and love for his best friend than towards him, his little brother, so whatever this was—god he hoped it wasn't because of the phone incident—it really didn't bode well for him.

He flinched when Itachi smiled, as he began, his eyes somber. "He thought that I'd hate him." The tone was incredulous, and Sasuke could well understand. After their cousin, Shisui—Sai's older and much more sane brother—passed away, Itachi had been shattered. Not as badly as Sai or maybe he just broke differently, but shattered nonetheless. Itachi had been under the impression that he killed Shisui—though how he could think the car accident was his fault was a mystery only Itachi understood, he had warned Shisui not to attempt the bike jump across the street after all—and as a result, had pushed everyone away.

That was the year he locked Sasuke in the closet for six hours with the lights off.

Fuck his brother was an ass.

Whatever the case, Naruto had been the only one willing to work through his bullshit to be his friend. In essence, Naruto had healed him. So, the thought of Itachi ever hating him was laughable, Itachi would die for the blonde. Hell, from the way he was looking at Sasuke, he'd kill him for Naruto and not even bat an eyelash over it.

"Hn." Sasuke had intoned to show that he'd heard and understood Itachi's words, both spoken and unspoken.

"… So what if he likes boys? I don't see a problem with that. If you love someone, you love them, all else be damned."

That was the first time he'd ever heard his brother sound so sincere, and for a moment, Sasuke had wondered if he had ever really known his brother.

And with that one proclamation, Sasuke's world collapsed.

From then on he'd been unable to deny his own truths. He himself was at the very least bi, though he was almost certain he swung one way only and it was neither straight or gay. He wanted Naruto, and that was it. Itachi's words had killed him, he loved Naruto and all else could be damned. For an entire year he kept silent and tormented himself with his own thoughts. He would wonder what would happen if he just reached out and touched Naruto.

If he kissed that laughing mouth and pushed his tongue in between white teeth would he taste Ramen or oranges? Or if he licked the edge of the idiot's ear while he drove him home from school… if he crawled into Naruto's lap, straddling and rubbing against him… if he sank to his knees and nibbled the front of Naruto's fly, nuzzling, kissing, and showing him how much he would work for his 'cream'…

A sharp shudder passed through him and Sasuke moaned, no longer trapped in memories from the last year. He would never admit out loud that the thought of being subservient to Naruto turned him on; of being owned and consumed by that vivacious personality.

Sasuke could feel the aching heat build in his lower belly. He squirmed as the tingling grew and his pants tightened. It was the kind of heat that would persist and not abate until he'd orgasmed. Sasuke frowned a bit, it was annoying and rather painful if he tried to ignore his body's demands—he would know—and yet, like a masochist, he often waited to see how long he could stand the bitter-sweet agony, his clothes and the soft air currents in the room enough to make him sweat.

_"Naruto likes cats… little black ones…"_

Itachi's words came back to haunt him and Sasuke felt his heart beat pick up speed until it throbbed in his soft tissues. His eyes dilated and his cheeks flushed with his quickened breath at the reminder, and the sweet pain turned unbearable when he thought of his revealing costume.

At the moment, he could clearly imagine himself in the short pleather shorts, and the fishnet top, the ears and tail looking rather fetish as he knelt between Naruto's thighs—jeans rumpled and undone, cloth boxers bunched below a thick and heavy need—licking at the engorged length.

Sasuke shivered, closing his eyes to better appreciate the fantasy, and lost himself to it, his hand slipping into his pants to fondle his own growing erection, circling it slowly, his fingertips a bare brush of skin. The heat made him wonder how hot Naruto's length would feel in his mouth, and his hand gripped down and started to pump.

He hissed between his teeth, imagining rough calloused fingers—the ones he'd once known better than his own—tangling through his hair, knocking black cat ears askew as hips flexed rhythmically against Sasuke's swollen red lips. Pre-cum glistened upon them, mixed with saliva and gathered at the corners of the diligently working mouth, staining the lips like some perverse lip gloss as they nibbled and suckled along the sides, tongue darting out to lap at the flesh in a coquettish manner. He let his teeth scrape carefully against the tender skin, so lightly it was barely felt. All the same, Naruto would gasp and his fingers would tighten in his hair and pull it erotically.

Sasuke gasped, his hand pumping to the flexing motions he imagined Naruto's hips to have taken up and licked his lips, wishing he really had the lingering taste of the other's pre-ejaculate there, but all he received was the salty taste of his own skin. He sank deeper into his fantasy, blocking out the rest of the world around him. In this dream, Naruto was his that was the only part that was important.

Scarred cheeks were flushed darkly as deep, appreciative, and demanding blue eyes looked down on him and a raspy moan escaped him, his body aching and writhing in joy. Naruto's full lips quirked up and into a grin as he gasped out to Sasuke—still far too coherent for someone getting blown—his voice commanding and haughty. "You'll… have to…" a soft grunt interrupted the words as Sasuke tilted his head, his cheek pressed to the hot skin of Naruto's thigh as he suckled at the base of his dick, prodding the thick throbbing vein with his tongue. "Oh god yes… hmmm yes, like that kitten…" Sasuke moved back up training the vein with the very tip of his tongue, "You'll have to … do more than that to earn your—"Sasuke circled the very tip of the erection, his lips pulling down to embrace the edges in a lingering caress. "Oh god—c—cream… kitten…"

Sasuke's muscles locked and he gripped himself tighter, stroking faster and the burn made his heart pound. The image of Naruto, parting Sasuke's lips with a thumb and angling his cock inside of Sasuke's open mouth, imagining the slick slide of the large and stiff hot member on his tongue in his throat, the taste salty and strong, the full feeling as Naruto completely indulged in his orifice, was almost too much.

Sasuke had always wondered if he'd be good at giving head. He'd been able to tie cherry stems with his tongue after Sakura—a girl who'd been in his class since first grade—had showed him she could do it. Taking it as a challenge he'd taken to eating cherries by the box. Looking back on it, he understood why Naruto had blushed when Sasuke had stuck his tongue out with the knotted cherry stem that first time, but that had been different. He had practiced with bananas as Sai had suggested the first time Sauske had come to terms with his feelings. Embarrassingly enough, his emotionally retarded cousin had had to teach him to control his gag reflex—the sadist had nearly choked him with the bananas the bastard—but the humiliation had been well worth it. He could now comfortably swallow a banana without problems.

With that talent in mind, Sasuke bit his lip and imagined how Naruto would enjoy his mouth, fucking his face with abandon while moaning compliments and petting Sasuke's face, hair, and neck in praise. God, he could clearly hear Naruto's gruff voice lamenting his talents while sliding in and out of his throat and passed his swollen lips. He stroked himself to that fantasy, drowning in the imagined friction and glide of a hot dick against his slick and abused lips, the tight sensation of it filling his throat and mouth was consumed with his own heat and desire.

He wanted to imagine words of love but dared not to. That would ultimately ruin the fantasy. It would hurt too much to return to reality and know that it would never come true. It was better to remain in lust only, to enjoy the freedom of his mind, to play the sensual slut enjoying the heat of fingers, breathy pants and encouragement for more.

His legs were trembling, shaking at the blissful pain that grew more intense with each slide of his eager hand. Already his clothes were damp and clinging to his skin as beads of perspiration trailed over his heaving sides, tickling his senses. He was so close he could taste it in every breath. The tightening coil in his gut pulsed with every throbbing heartbeat his weeping cock. Sasuke gasped, throwing himself back into the fantasy as he headed for the end.

"Naruto… uhg… Naru...oh!"

He imagined the way Naruto would jerk in-deep, forcing his way down Sasuke's willing throat as he came hard; thick jets of bitter cum sliding down Sasuke's quickly swallowing esophagus, the liquid spilling heavily into his mouth only to slip out around his clamped lips to paint his chin and neck in thin trails of desire.

Naruto breathed his name through clenched teeth, grip impossibly tight in his hair, not allowing him to pull off of the softening cock.

"Naruto!" Sasuke grunted, arching into his own hand as waves of stinging heat forced his own seed out and over his fingers; sticky, hot and messy. He fell limp with satisfaction, every muscle quaking with his heart beat. The sweat and cum cooling against him felt gross, but decidedly pleasing as well as he let out a sedated sigh, finishing his fantasy with a longing tenderness he only found in his dreams.

Naruto would calm slowly, his clenched fingers relaxing to run through sweaty hair as he slowly eased out of Sasuke's sucking, red, swollen, used lips, enjoying the lingering cling and stimulation provided. Blue eyes would regard those lips with tenderness, one born from affection if it was only for the pleasure they could give. He would then ease Sasuke's face up, his skull cradled in those larger hands and smile at his debauched and wanton expression. Slowly, he'd coax Sasuke up and into his lap, his larger form enclosing him in warm arms as lips tasted the ones he'd just used. A limber tongue invades to sample his own lingering flavor; turning the kiss, slow, tender, and sweet.

Naruto pulls away with a lingering lick to Sasuke's lower lip, a tease, then smiles nuzzling him a bit. "Good little kitten…"

Sasuke blinked looking up at his ceiling as his hand dragged out from his pants, smearing white up his stomach. The clinging excess on his skin made him feel hollow and, lifting his hand, he watched as it dripped down his arm slowly. _This can't be healthy…_

Wiping his hands off on his pants, he needed to wash them any way, he continued to look up at the paint flecks and ponder his predicament. _The problem is… how can I stop? _With a snort he rolled to his side and glared at the window, wishing there was a way out. A way to get the Dobe's attention without having to say anything at all, but realistically he knew there was no way to do that aside from simply attacking him or sneaking into his room to lay on his bed butt-naked. He doubted that would even work.

For several long moments Sasuke lay there, looking at the orange curtain dancing in the breeze, feeling his ejaculate drying in his pants gluing everything together, before he heard the trill of the phone. Adrenaline spiked through him at the thought that in might be Naruto, but he beat it back with his stubborn reason. _Probably just Kiba making sure I don't back out of that stupid bet…_

Black eyes widened then as realization struck moments before he heard the echo of his brothers footsteps coming up the stairs.

And he was covered in…'evidence'.

_Shit!_ For a panicked moment he wondered how fast he'd have to move to lock the door before Itachi got there, but knew it was futile the moment the doorknob began to turn. In an act of desperate self-perseverance, Sasuke grabbed the throw blanket that rested on the foot of his bed—a present from his grandmother when he'd been but a fetus—and pulled it over his lap, flopping back against his pillows faking sleep.

"Nice try Sasuke." Itachi sounded unamused and that tone let him know that his brother had not noticed his recent activities, his relief was immeasurable.

Rolling over slowly, Sasuke glared over his shoulder at his brother. If Itachi ever found out about his little jerk-off session he'd tease him till he died, all the while, knowing full well the futility of his desires. Sasuke didn't want to deal with that at the moment.

From the scowl, and the distance at which he held the phone from his ear it was clear he thought Sasuke was faking sleep to escape the phone call. He obviously felt it sufficient enough reason to hide. It was almost amusing.

"Hn."

Itachi tossed the phone his way at his 'response'. It landed on the carpet just feet from his bed. Sasuke blinked at it but made no attempt or effort to retrieve it. Itachi lifted an eyebrow.

"I don't really care what you do little brother," somehow the nickname came out as an insult. He really wondered how the hell Itachi managed that, "but be sure to get him off the line quick. I'm expecting a call." Then the bastard smirked.

The arrogant ass was talking about Naruto.

"Hn." He returned and watched as Itachi walked out, closing the door behind him. When the sound of his retreat faded, Sasuke sprang from the bed and locked the door. The wood was pleasantly cool under his palms and it helped calm his nerves. Sasuke slumped then, breathing out the last of his tension as his eyes strayed to his dirtied unbound pants.

"…that… was way too close." He grumbled while pulling the belt loose, letting the pants fall, hitting the floor with barely a whisper. Adjusting his boxers and looking for a new pair, Sasuke realized he could hear muffled sounds, like someone cursing. He immediately looked up and at the orange curtained window, but it was empty.

_Oh… right… the phone._ Sasuke took his time changing his boxers and replacing his bottoms with some sleep pants before picking the cordless up and sitting on his bed.

"—_cock-sucking crotch-cricket!_" Kiba sounded pissed at whoever he was currently cursing at. The teen did it often enough, and at numerous persons that it was possible that it might not be anyone near him. He assumed it was his brother, though Kiba did have a tendency to attach colorful adjectives to his name as well, so really he couldn't be certain. "_You syphilis contracted, trogladite—"_ Sasuke smirked finding Kiba's colorful and unique curse words amusing, and sat back to see how long this rant would last. He had once managed to curse out a teacher for thirty minutes solid, and though it was probably not worth the suspension he got it had been a new record. That and some of the things he'd said he doubted the teacher had ever heard of before. But, in all honesty who ever thought of, 'a toster-raping toad-ass' as an insult? Obviously Kiba did. "—_son of a butt-monkey-fucking weasel-whore!_"

Ah, it was Itachi.

That settled, Sasuke waited for the initial pause the other would have to make to breath before interrupting with a calm, "Kiba."

The rant broke abruptly. "Sasuke."

There was a moment of mutual silence before Kiba spoke again, the words the same tired litany he'd been using since Itachi had taken one look at him upon his first visit, and called the humane society. "You're brother's a dick."

Sasuke smiled well aware that the other couldn't see it. _Tell me something I don't know…_

"Careful, he might be on the other line. Listening."

"Jesus, he's creepy!" Kiba's voice sounded uneasy and he could clearly picture the expression on the brunette's face as he shuddered, and Sasuke grinned wider. "He ain't human."

"Hn." Sasuke well agreed with that statement, but on the off chance that Itachi was listening in like a creeper, he wanted to give no reason for the antichrist to choose him as his next target.

"So, you got the costume?" The voice took on a vindictive edge that Sasuke tried to ignore. _Seriously, this is so not worth the stupid bet… so he got detention with Mr. Sabaku, it's not like it's my fault, the fucking mutt… He's the one who got caught… besides he was the one who bet I couldn't hide that nasty fucking puppet and not get caught… I didn't, he did…_ Sasuke pouted a bit knowing that thinking about it didn't help. Even if the blame had landed on Kiba and not Sasuke, he still technically lost the bet since the puppet had been found. _He should be glad Mr. Sabaku's younger brother is away at med school right now…_ Sasuke thought, recalling the nightmare that was Gaara. He'd been certain the eye-brow-less wonder had been out to kill him that last year. The thought of that man as a psychiatrist was downright horrifying…

…and now he was stalling.

"Sasuke?"

"Hn."

"Good." Kiba sounded far too please with himself. "We'll be by around six, so get you're tiny-hiney into the costume."

"I hate you."

"I know." Inuzaka sounded far too smug for Sasuke's taste and he promptly hung up.

XXX

He could hear Naruto's voice from downstairs before he even hit the landing. _I can't do this!_ For a frantic moment he couldn't move down the last few steps. From this angle he knew his shins and the damned black books were visible and most likely the tip of his velvet tail as well, but nothing more; nothing incriminating. The blonde's voice was loud and boisterous. It sounded as carefree and light as always and it warmed Sasuke straight to the tips of his ears. He knew the expression the other would be wearing on his expressive face, just as he knew he'd be wearing some god awful orange sweater that made him look thirty-eight instead of a mere nineteen.

He knew the other could dress himself up—though he'd feared he'd never outgrow that sweat gear phase he'd had when Itachi had succumbed to his purple nail-polish and colored contact one—he'd seen Naruto wear some things, probably picked out by their mutual friend Temari, that simply made all brain process cease when he walked by, but when left up to his comfort, the idiot often chose for the most boring items available.

It was humiliating that he could still pull it off and make Sasuke drool.

Then again Naruto in a paper bag could make Sasuke's temperature spike so perhaps his judgment wasn't the best. He was rather biased, but that was far from the point. Sasuke was literally glued to the spot and he couldn't stop his heart from trying to leap from his chest. _Okay… the possible seduction ploy was stupid, unrealistic and plainly retarded!_ Sasuke screeched in the relative safety of his head, palms sweating profusely. _How can I face the humility of wearing this in front of him? I look like… like…_

"Ah! I see you Sasuke-_kun_!"

Kiba was soon to be a eunuch.

"Huh?" Naruto's voice almost made him turn and bolt back up the stairs. God, Itachi walking in on him masturbating was better than this. At least that was not premeditated nor did it require more words than, 'fuck!,' 'ass-hole,' and 'get out'. This would undoubtedly require an explanation. One he was certain he actually knew all the details for. "Hey, bastard, come down here! Itachi and Kiba have been practically climbing the walls waiting for you."

The dobe was heading toward him and Sasuke let out a strangled sound as his knees locked.

"It can't be as bad as that year your mother had you go as Raggedy Andy for your Cousin." Naruto teased as he came into view. As expected he was in a bright orange sweater that had black patches to make it look like some giant jack-o-lantern and black jeans. They were loose in the legs but looked snug around his hips and ass. It would have been nice had that ugly-ass, baggy sweater not covered them, and the striped orange socks not finished off the ensemble.

Though, wearing what he was, Sasuke had no room to judge.

"Naw, he's just embarrassed because he lost the bet." Kiba chimed in, just as blue eyes opened from his laughing to look at him.

"Bet? What be—" The words broke off midstream and that mouth dropped open in shock. Blue eyes widened as pupils dilated until only a sliver of sky remained. It would have been hilarious had Sasuke not felt indecently exposed, and like a recalcitrant child, because though the expression was one of shock, there was no sign of lust anywhere in that posture. _Of course not… he sees me like a little brother._ That thought prodded his indignant anger and finally freed him from his stasis.

"Hn." Standing straight, hands placed on his hips, Sasuke clopped—because in the heavy soled boots there was no other way too walk—down the stairs. His movements caused the already too short shorts to bunch and ride up a bit. He could feel the cooler air brush the edges of his buttocks with each step and knew the pleather hugged his back side tightly enough to prove there was no room for undergarments. The boots slapped his thighs with each step that brought the looser fabric back against his pale skin, and the stuffed tail bounced off the zippers in their backs.

The mesh black top tucked into the shorts, held in place by the large belt with the sliver buckle, and though it had long sleeves that came up to the middle of his palm—the little thumb holes were the only redeeming quality of the thing—it did little to cover his form, nor to hide just how chilled he really was.

The belt like collar with the insanely large silver bell along with the ridiculous kitty ears—made of clay and bound to his head by a black rope that hid beneath his hair—completed the humiliating outfit, but Sasuke would not be cowed by it. If he had to wear the damned thing, he'd make it look good.

His heart was still racing and he knew his ears were red when he passed by Naruto—the blonde unable to do much but follow him with his eyes and head making gurgling sounds. He smelled like citrus—he knew the other used a grapefruit type of shower gel and attributed it to that—and strangely enough like leaves. He wondered if he'd been dragged into the leaf piles by the smaller children on the street earlier in the day. The man had a real soft spot for the ankle biters.

It was insulting to know he was relegated to their category as well.

"Damn Sasuke, I thought it would be funny but…" Kiba trailed off, his eyes roaming freely before he broke into an amused grin. "You might get mistaken for a hooker if you stand too long at any one corner!" And then the other was laughing viciously. Kiba was right; he'd probably get dollar bills shoved down his shorts.

Sasuke wanted to point out that his own costume—something he called 'Pyramid Head' from some video game—made him look like a stripper, but he assumed the giant 'blood' splattered triangular head piece would fix that problem.

Itachi was smirking, and Sasuke met that look uncertainly, only to have his brother tip his head in Naruto's direction.

The blonde was still staring at him, mouth agape.

"You trying to catch flies, dobe?" He asked casually when he finally hit the floor and shifted his weight to look mockingly up at Naruto. "Or do you see something you like?" Where ever the hell he got his balls from for that line, Sasuke was pleased, as that face—sporting six faint colorless scars that he'd always assumed he'd gained in the crash that had taken his parents' lives—turned red and the mouth snapped shut, blue eyes jerking over to his brother.

"He is _not _leaving like that." Naruto sounded so serious about it that Sasuke nearly felt his own jaw drop in response.

"You aren't my mother!" He snapped back, uncertain why he was fighting this. He didn't want to wear the damned thing anyway, but having the older teen treat him like a child pissed him off. He was practically an adult damn it! Why couldn't Naruto see that?

Naruto ignored him, still glaring at Itachi. His dick of a brother just leaned against the closest wall, arms crossed over his black button down shirt that lay free over his own black pants. He of course was wearing blood red slippers and appeared to have joined the holiday spirit—Naruto probably black-mailed and/or brow beat him into it while Sasuke had been wrestling his ass into the shorts—and had fake fangs in his mouth. He was wearing his Goth makeup again, and looked far too good in it.

There were no words to describe his brother without screaming and crying involved.

Really.

_There is no way we are related. I am adopted… or maybe he was…_ Sasuke's distracted thoughts were brought back to the present when Itachi finally spoke up.

"I don't see why not." Itachi remained placid while Naruto spluttered and changed through several different hues of color. Sasuke felt his chest puff out a bit recalling Itachi's previous words on his maturity. For once his brother's aid was welcome and Sasuke turned a smirk on the blonde, whose expression only darkened further. "He is old enough to make his own decisions. If you recall Naruto we too came to our sexual maturity around his age."

Sasuke glared at his brother, no longer appreciative of his help. _Ah, so the devil returns…_

"Itachi, you can see his _ass_!" The uncouth idiot actually had the nerve to point at it like some strange or diseased thing. Insulted, Sasuke turned around. If the other couldn't appreciate the glory that was his back end—he was proud of that smooth muscled surface and he knew it looked good—then he would miss out.

Kiba made a choking noise and he heard a stumbling crash from behind him quickly followed by Shikamaru's mutter—the other was dressed in a bed sheet with holes cut out to see—something about staying at home, and Choji let out a grunt. The latter was of course dressed like Pro-wrestler of some kind. The kid had some obsession with it, though Sasuke always thought he'd make a better line-backer then a wrestler, he'd never have the heart to tell his friend that.

He felt a little better after Kiba's reaction. The guy was straight after all, if he'd looked and reacted, then his ass was in perfect shape, dobe's and their blind idiocies be damned. "It's my ass. I'll do what I want with it."

Kiba choked.

"What? The hell you will you little brat! Now go upstairs and put some damned clothes on before your freeze your tiny nuts off!" Naruto barked back at him, looking the role of an angered parent a little too well.

"I'm not the one called, "tiny penis", dobe, and you aren't my damned keeper, so back off!" Sasuke yelled right back. He was not about to be cowered and told what he could and could not wear, especially when the older boy had no right or designs on his body in which to make such requests.

"Perhaps not, but you fucking well need one if you're planning to go out there looking like some cock-slut, little jail-bait!" Naruto hissed out, and it wasn't complimenting at all. Naruto looked sickened by the mere words. The hurt mixed well with the rage and made Sasuke stand his ground and put his nose in the air defiantly. "And Sai is a jealous and confused pre-teen who is way too curious about my anatomy!" Naruto paused to take in Sasuke's stance and then his lip curled in a mocking sneer. "Besides, my junk isn't the one snug nice and pretty in little Lolita shorts, Sasuke-_chan_."

That's it, cute face be damned, he was busting the fucker's lip open.

"Now, now, you two no need to get dirty." Itachi smoothly caught Sasuke up stopping him from the lunge he would have made and pulling him back against his chest. "Okay Kiba, I think it's time you explained this so that you all can enjoy your candy stealing and subsequent sugar induced highs and inevitable comas."

"Thank god." Shikamaru muttered again, and Sasuke wondered if the other was really just that lazy or if he was trying to be E.T. The shoes were covered so he couldn't be certain.

"What?" Naruto asked, still geared up for a fight, and turned his glare on Kiba. The other boy gulped and then scratched his arm uncomfortably. "What is he talking about Kiba?" Naruto's baby sitter tone was leaking through and all of his friends—save Shikamaru—flinched in recognition.

"Well, you see it went like this…" Kiba began and Shikamaru let out a huff , shuffling off to the couch with a muttered 'go home' before he flopped down for what would most likely be a very long discussion. With Kiba, it always was. "So, you know how Mr. Sabaku likes those weird puppet things from all over the world and shit?"

"Kankuro?" Naruto asked, looking a little confused on what this had to do with their history teacher. Not that Sasuke could blame him, slutty, kitty cosplay and their weird teacher were a bit disturbing in combination.

"Yeah, him! Well, I bet Sasuke that there was no way anyone could get away with the school legend of running the damned thing up the flag pole without getting caught." Kiba began reiterating the prank the blonde teen had been the only one to ever succeed in pulling off. Though as Kiba said, he was caught, but that was only after he was out of the school entirely.

"Oh really?" Naruto asked, his anger morphing into bemused humor, and it just made Sasuke struggle harder against his brother. It wasn't fair! Why was he warming up to Kiba? Why couldn't he just notice this already! What did he have to do? Beg him to fuck him hard and long?

Sasuke flushed darkly at his own thought and immediately tried to banish it.

"Calm down Little Brother, or this ploy won't work."

_Huh? What the fuck was he talking about?_

"Yeah, well Sasuke said that he could do it, I of course thought he was full of shit, so the deal was that if he got caught he had to do whatever I told him to do for a week, and if he did it, I'd… er…" Kiba broke off to blush embarrassed.

"You'd…?" Naruto pushed eyes narrowing.

"I'd go trick or treating as a black S&M sex kitten."

There was a long pause in which no one spoke and Sasuke swore he felt his brother laughing quietly.

"Okay… so why is _he _dressed like a…" And Naruto flushed a little here. "…sex kitten. And you aren't?"

Kiba looked up startled and blinked at Naruto in a daze. "… what do you mean?"

Naruto chuckled—it was just so fucking unfair that that sound could make him shiver and turn his inside to molten mush—and Sasuke unconsciously relaxed enough that Itachi released him, placing one calming hand on his shoulder instead. "Come on Kiba, if anyone could get away with it, it would be Sasuke."

He felt an odd little jolt of happiness at those words but it was small and fleeting.

"Though, he's obviously ass-retarded to have fallen into this one. So what happened?"

"Hn." Sasuke snorted crossing his arms. "He got blamed for it and had to spend the last two weeks in after school detention with Kankuro." Sasuke said flippantly. Knowing and growing up around Gaara gave him more than enough right to call his teacher by his first name, though the history professor saw it differently.

Naruto snorted. "_You_ got blamed for it?"

Kiba pouted. "Yeah, and thanks to that I was put on the bench for the rest of the season." The dog lover pouted epically. "We finally make it into the finals and I get benched!"

Sasuke winced and looked away. He really did feel bad about that. The other lived and breathed Soccer, and due to a string of bad weather and ties, the season had stretched far longer than usual ending with Konoha High in the finals for the first time in over five years. And because of him, Kiba could not participate. Putting up with a little humiliation was nothing in comparison.

"Ah, I get it, so this is penance." Naruto said turning his eyes—far too knowing and understanding on Sasuke. "And you take your debts very seriously." His tone was almost fond, and it only twisted the bitter knife lodged in his chest.

"Hn. Yeah, whatever, can we go now?" He ignored the hurt look in blue eyes and shrugged his brother's hand off. Shikamaru had either died of boredom or fallen asleep on the couch, and Choji was hurriedly sneaking candy from the dish by the door into his own bag. Kiba seemed to be the only one paying attention.

"Hells yeah! Can't let the candy wait!" With a speed that spoke of far too much comfort in his platform shoes—according to Kiba, Pyramid Head was a seven foot tall monster, Kiba was lucky if he broke 5'8" in those things—he raced out the door. "Come on Shika!"

The ghost—E.T.—bored teen slowly sat up and slumped out with barely a sound after the hyperactive Kiba who had put on his giant mask and was now creeping down the sidewalk scaring babies and mother's along the way. He'd be lucky not to get arrested.

"Come on Choji." Sasuke said, angling the other out of the door before stepping out himself.

"Sasuke." His brother's tone made him turn and he found Naruto watching him with a very blank expression. It unnerved him that he couldn't read it, but the moment passed when a group of kids dressed in bright colors and lighted costumes screamed out, "Trick or treat!"

"Oh wow! Look at you all!" Naruto chirped picking up the candy bowl and dropping chocolates into each little plastic carrier before him chatting with each child and playing along when they made growling sounds and the like.

Yup. He was being placated like the little toddler in the Ninja Turtle Costume.

Sasuke officially had no Ego.

Itachi who had been watching, smiled and clapped him briefly on the shoulder to regain his attention. "… just try not to get raped."

Sasuke scowled and flipped him off.

Itachi's voice followed him down the walk as he stomped away into the—rather chill and cold—night. "I already told you Sasuke, I'm not into either of those things… though I'm starting to think we need to sit down and have a family chat about your tendencies." He missed the smirk his brother turned to the cloudy sky, with the distant flicker of light on the horizon, as he tried to keep himself from freezing before catching up with the bloodied stripper, E.T., and the unknown wrestler.

His life was made of total suck.

XXX

The night had been fine. Sure he'd been glared at and ignored by most of the adults. His ass had been groped once—the other would be lucky if the paramedics could straighten the limb again—but aside from that it had been rather fun. What with Kiba getting chased off by a dog when some lady refused to give any of them candy, Choji managing to pilferage even more candy from random people while Sasuke was lectured on decency, and watching Shikamaru play the Role of E.T. perfectly. He even said he wanted to go home a time or two. Though, the computer nerd probably meant it literally, even as he stayed with them. But, as all things that had happened so far in his miserable day, it all came crashing down when, with an impressive crack of thunder, it started to pour.

Not just pour, but pour icy sheets of rain that drenched them in moments. It was utter bullshit. Of course Kiba had jolted and made a B-line for his house calling after the others to join him, it was closer, but there was no way in hell Sasuke was going into familiar territory—his friend's house no less—dressed like he was. So, Sasuke had shook his wet head and said he was headed home. The others didn't fight hard, they were wet and cold but their concern was noted, and that was how he ended up here; running through the rain soaked to the bone and shaking as though he were in shock.

His boot slapped his thighs uncomfortably, chaffing the redden, chilled skin. If the outfit had been uncomfortably before, it was agonizing now, and Sasuke couldn't wait to get home and into a warm tub. _Then I'll sleep this off like a bad hang over…_ Not that he really knew what one was like. Sure that one time Itachi and Naruto had gotten him drunk but he really didn't remember much besides their punishment the following day, and waking up in a bath tub covered in vomit.

God he hated his brother.

Finally his house came into view and, ignoring the rain sliding down his practically bare form, Sasuke leaped up onto the porch and grabbed the door handle. He was shocked when he slammed straight into the cold unyielding wood when he stepped forward to enter his house. Blinking, he slowly took note of the darkened windows and the lack of a porch light.

'W-w-what th—the f—f-f—fu—fuck?" Sasuke stuttered out dropping his bag to wrap his arms around himself. Either Itachi was playing another stupid trick on him, or the fucker had left. Not feeling up to the games, Sasuke checked under the welcome mat for the spare.

It was, of course, missing.

"Itachi, you fucking ass! Open the fucking door!" Sasuke cried, pounding his fist against the door making small bursts of tingling pain spark up the entirety of his arm. He was going numb, that was a bad sign. "Itachi if I get pneumonia again I'll make sure you get it too you sorry son of a—"

"Sasuke!" The cry had him looking up and over to the adjacent house. The lights were all lit, even the stupid orange pumpkin ones that decorated the outside like some sick variation of _The Nightmare Before Christmas_. Standing just under the overhang on the porch was the familiar orange sweater and black pants combination that the idiot had been wearing earlier that evening. But what was he doing at his house now? Had they both decided to set up camp there instead?

With an angered shake of his head, Sasuke bolted across the way and dove into the warm house without even a 'thank you'.

"Gah, its freezing out there!" Naruto snapped, shutting the door with a shiver. Sasuke just stood there hunched, dripping and shaking, looking like a literal drowned cat. Finally blue eyes caught up. "Oh shit, you must be hypothermic by now!" And the blonde was moving again, running up the stairs only to return with more—wait for it—orange towels. They were fluffy, warm and smelled like Tide, and Sasuke couldn't even protest when Naruto began rubbing him dry like a five-year old. He probably couldn't unfold his arms if life depended on it.

"Fuck, I told Itachi not to leave until you got back… but no, had to go that fucking minute. I swear Kisame has something on him…" From Naruto's ramblings it was clear that Itachi's work had called him in for something. At least that explained the lack of a key. Itachi usually forgot the spare when he was in a rush.

Naruto had gotten both himself and Itachi jobs at the local Party and Decorations Depot, aptly named, "Party Décor". The owner was a very nice young woman, whom Sasuke had thought Naruto was dating before he'd come out, was very demure and quite, but she was a hard worker and demanded the same from her workers. Sasuke was still wondering how it was that Naruto had convinced his brother, the one looking into becoming a medical practitioner—dentist, Itachi wanted to be a fucking dentist, and Sasuke only hoped he never had to sit in the chair because only god knew what that asshole would do to him—to agree to work at a party shop.

He'd asked once. Casually, over breakfast and with both parental units in the room, and had only received a twisted grin that didn't quite reach his eyes and responded with, 'Oh, you know… this and that.'

He wasn't stupid enough to ask again.

He understood why Naruto, the man aiming to be a grade-school teacher, would enjoy such a job, hell the man screamed 'personable' in bold, orange letters, and yet, Itachi seemed to enjoy it as well. In fact, he'd been picking up extra shifts all the time. Sasuke chose to believe it was the pay. Either that, or his co-worker Kisame was giving him sexual favors.

But that was neither here, nor there.

"You see, this is why you should have worn something warmer." Naruto chided, still rubbing him dry with the towel, though, Sasuke noticed he was careful not to dislodge his 'ears' when he reached his hair. "You're practically hypothermic."

The cloth made his skin ache, but the blood flow was a relief and Sasuke finally managed to release his arms, letting them drop to his side. He was humiliated on many levels. Naruto had been right, and he'd spend a night dressed like a sex kitten, he was wet and nearly naked, and still the blonde didn't see anything but a small child, and he was being treated as such. All the same, Naruto was touching him, and Sasuke wasn't about to give that up, his pride be damned. "Hn."

"Oh, is that all you have to say? God you and Itachi both… what did your parents do, leave you in a locked room until you were eight? Your vocabulary sucks." Naruto griped, and Sasuke bristled. Naruto wouldn't stop drying him to have an argument, and even if he did the fight would bring him in full body contact with the blonde. Yes, Sasuke wasn't above using dirty tactics to get what he wanted.

He opened his mouth to retort that he damned well knew his vocabulary, and to prove just how many languages he could curse in, when a thunder clap from directly overhead shook the house to its very foundation. Both of them jumped at the sound, eyes locking just as all the lights went out at once, plunging the room into darkness.

"Oh, shit!" Naruto hissed after a moment, and Sasuke felt those hands grip his shoulders tightly through the fabric of the towel. Obviously, the teen wanted to make certain Sasuke didn't move. If Naruto intended to rummage around in the darkness—because the idiot had drawn all the curtains closed to make the house more frightening—to find the flashlight, he'd need to know where Sasuke was. Sasuke intellectually knew that was the reason, but at that moment he wasn't thinking intellectually.

His heart was hammering harshly against his ribs as nervous acid raced up his esophagus and his skin prickled with hypersensitivity. _This is it!_ His internal pervert whispered and Sasuke felt his own breath hitch as his mouth dropped. He'd widened his eyes as far as they could go, and still, he could see nothing. _It's just like a dream… _His heart fluttered and let him know what he was thinking was very stupid, in fact it was Kiba-stupid. Yet his nerves were egging him on, and he knew, just like he had before he jumped from the roof with the cardboard wings, that this wouldn't end well, but he was still going to do it.

His breath was mere panting now and he tilted forward pressing the crown of his head against Naruto's chest. The blonde froze a moment, the hands on his shoulders turning soft as he patted him gently. "Hey, it's just a power outage. I have furnace, just let me get the matches and I'll get a fire started to warm you up…"

He smelled like candy, Tide detergent, and pumpkin. An odd combination, though not too odd considering Naruto liked to eat pumpkin seeds and had probably cooked some up previously, and he had been dealing with candy all night. Sasuke breathed deeper and nuzzled a bit enjoying the warmth of the cloth, the hard press of Naruto's toned body, and the electrifying bravery the darkness gave him even as his face flamed with embarrassment.

He was invincible here where the darkness covered his shame, stole his reservation, and cloaked him with a sense of power. If he ever had a chance of getting what he wanted, it would be now, while the lights were gone, and the bizarre sense of ambiguity lingered. If they did it now, they could deny it in the light because they never saw each other. At least, that is what Sasuke told himself when Naruto started to pull back and he grabbed his wrist harshly stopping him.

"Sasuke?" Naruto sounded concerned and worried, but Sasuke could hardly hear him above the staccato pulse of his heart. "Sasuke… are you still afraid of the—"He never got to finish.

With his mind riding the high, Sasuke sank to his knees, fingers dragging across Naruto's form, catching and clinging to the cloth. Naruto had stopped breathing, but Sasuke tried not to think of that. He was in control here, it was fine, he could do this.

Naruto jumped when those fingers passed over the rough fabric and of jeans, and Sasuke whimpered, lightly stroking the front of Naruto's pants, feeling the grooves and edges where the fly was hidden, the button and the empty belt loops. His fingers traced the seams of the pockets and he briefly wish he could reach behind the blonde to follow the seam between the pockets, but he had only a few moments before the shock would wear off, and he had to convince Naruto not to shove him away.

With that goal in mind, Sasuke, drunk on his high, looped several fingers through the belt loop above him, his left hand still holding Naruto's wrist captive, and leaned forward to press his lips to the warm, rough fabric covering Naruto's crotch.

"Sssshit!" Naruto hissed out, finally releasing his breath, and he jerked a bit in Sasuke's grip. It was obvious, he was trying to pull away but he certain wasn't putting up much of a fight. Then again, what man would? "S—Sasuke? What the hell are you—_oh god!_" Naruto's voice jumped an octave when Sasuke opened his mouth and scraped his teeth over the cloth.

He nibbled at the fly to Naruto's jeans, poking his tongue around the flap of cloth to lick at the metal zipper its self. The rain blocked out the wet suckling sounds his tongue made against the 'teeth', but all the same he shuddered. Pushing closer, Sasuke pressed kisses against Naruto's front, pausing to nibble every so often.

The jeans felt odd against his teeth, and Sasuke bit down softly several times enjoying the resistance of the cloth as well as the noises Naruto made in response.

"O—oh god…" Naruto gasped, and a strong hand grabbed his shoulder and pushed him a bit in an attempt to break the contact. "Sasuke, s—stop! What are you—ah!" Naruto grunted at a sharp nip Sasuke gave to the swelling bulge under his lips and that hand dragged him forward crushing his lips into resisting clothes as those hips jerked in response.

Sasuke's nerves were on fire and his adrenalin was pumping through him. He couldn't have spoken if he wanted to. His nerves kept him silent, and the anxiety was a large constricting lump in his throat, he hoped to replace it with something else soon.

"No… Sasuke… I… I can't… promised… promised I wouldn't…" Naruto was still struggling but even Sasuke had to admit it was a futile and pathetic one. Still, his reluctance to simply let Sasuke blow him was nerve wracking and so he released Naruto's wrist, his hand grabbing at the button and ripping the jeans open.

Naruto gasped and Sasuke tangled his hand in more fabric as his teeth latched on to the zipper and pulled it down. The vibrations through his teeth made his head buzz and he could only imagine what that must feel like on Naruto's swelling erection. From the sharp shudder, it must have felt pleasant at least. Hands carded through his hair then, fingers curling warm against his nape and pulling him in.

Must have felt damned good.

Sasuke could smell the thick musk emanating from the heated fabric and when his mouth closed in a kiss over soft cotton of boxers, he felt the heated hardness twitch against him. His lower stomach clenched as fire blossomed and his shorts became insanely tight. His whimper made the penis against his nibbling mouth fill out further, and those hands pressed him deeper between the opening of the pants. The open zipper scraped his already chapped cheeks and Sasuke dropped his mouth open to suckle.

"No… oh, sweet god almighty… no… please stop Sasuke…" Naruto pleaded though his hands held him captive. Not exactly the dominating seme Sasuke had always imagined, but hey, he wasn't complaining. The fabric was abrasive with its damp quality and made a wet sound around the hard shaft. Sasuke was mildly amazed at how hot the member was. He knew how heated his became when he jerked off, but he never realized how sensitive his lips could be to temperature.

Tilting his head Sasuke made sure to drench the whole outline of the fully erect dick he could feel, and Naruto's hips continued to jerk against him as his hands tightened in his hair. The towel hung from his shoulder forgotten, but its weight was stabilizing and it gave Sasuke the focus point he needed to pull back. He wanted to taste Naruto when he came.

"… yes…oh. Yes… oh—no! God don't—"Naruto gasped, fingers clutching and yanking him forward. Sasuke used the grip on the belt loops to hold his face back long enough to lean up and lick at a bit of sweatshirt and skin. "Sasuke…" Naruto groaned, fingers relaxing and he took a moment to discover this small patch of flesh.

Naruto groaned a bit, shivered and grunted, before gasping when Sasuke found the edge of his boxers and bit down, pulling the fabric back and down with him. "Fuck yes…" It sounded like a prayer.

The damp, scorching tip of Naruto's member smeared against his cheek and Sasuke froze, breathing hard. _I'm really doing this… I'm… I'm really going to do this…_ Sasuke was shocked at himself and couldn't continue, and then one hand released his hair and smoothed over his face. Padded finger touched his jaw and lips. The callused tips ran over them a few times before coaxing him to release the elastic band.

He did automatically and the hand caught the material pushing it down himself. Sasuke felt his hands lower slightly as the Jeans were forced down as well. Not too far, but still lower, enough to entirely free the trapped erection. Sasuke nearly lost his load right there. Naruto wanted this too, god, this would probably be his only chance and he wouldn't waste it. With that in mind, Sasuke shivered as the hand that had pushed the boxers down gripped his shoulder and then both the one in his hair, and the one on his body, pulled him closer.

"Please…" It was a whisper so small Sasuke was certain he'd imagined it, but all the same his fingers left their guard on the belt loops and slowly he dragged them up to explore. Jeans and cotton were rumpled and wrinkled and gave way swiftly to hot skin. Naruto whimpered aloud and Sasuke's body jolted with need at the sound. Fuck, he was so damned hard it hurt. _This is more important…so much more…_

Coarse curls disrupted the smooth expanse of flesh and then the hard, pulsing length he'd fantasized about was within his hand. He stroked it a time or too, getting a feel for the skin, the girth and length. A bit bigger than a banana, but Sasuke figured he could handle it. "Just put it in your pretty little mouth bastard…" Naruto hissed, obviously close to his limit, and Sasuke shuddered again at the deep undercurrent of desire that wove through his words.

He wanted this, oh god, did he ever want this, and so did the blonde. Licking his lips Sasuke leaned in. He let his breath ghost over the tip as he let his lips caress it with a butterfly's kiss. Naruto's breath hitched and the fingers bit into flesh. Sasuke enjoyed the minor pain, and let his other hand, not holding the base of the cock he was about to try and swallow, smoothing up and down a tensed thigh. The muscles under the clothes bunched and twitched. It was erotic and so very thrilling to know he was causing it. "Damn it, Sasuke… stop playing and suck me already…"

He sure got over his denial fast.

Well, there was no denying that Naruto was fully male. Get him hard and he stops thinking about anything that doesn't involve his dick. _Thank god!_ Sasuke was afraid he'd have to beg him to just enjoy the blow job.

With a soft nod Naruto could feel because of the hand there, Sasuke opened his mouth wider and, tilting his head to the side, suckled the side, feeling the large vein pulse against his prodding tongue.

"Uh!"

The skin was bitter, salty and Sasuke didn't care, it was Naruto. Hell he wouldn't care if his cum ended up tasting like orange sherbet, this was his new favorite flavor. Suckling and lapping Sasuke made his way around the entire circumference of the phallus. Naruto made very few sounds louder than a grunt and moan, but the flexing fingers and haggard breath told him he was doing well.

He'd have to thank Sai for the Bananas.

Moving back up he finally caught some of the pre-ejaculate. It was sweeter than he was expecting, but it was still rather bitter overall. But it wasn't too bad. Pulling back Sasuke breathed a few times, swallowing down the last of his insecurities. He was an Uchiha damn it, they were notoriously good at everything and so he would give the best damned blow-job Naruto ever got.

With that in mind he opened his mouth and encased the tip completely. He'd intended to play with it, to tease the slit with the tip of his tongue, to whorl around it and suckle like the kitten he was dressed as, but this was not his fantasy, and Naruto was not made of stone. As such, Naruto's hips jerked forward and his hand pulled and Sasuke's eyes flew wide as he was suddenly swallowing a large hot cock.

"Hgnnnnnn!" Naruto panted, his hips pumping a few jerky times, and Sasuke's eyes watered from the sore feeling in his throat from being stretched. He had trained his gag reflex certainly, but that was only when he had some control and warning before something slipped down. This was not the case, and so naturally he gagged.

Sasuke quickly tried to control it, forcing himself to swallow several times and consciously remembering to curl his lips around his teeth to keep from biting. Naruto groaned again and thrust once more, before pulling back gasping. "S—sorry… are you…"

Sasuke never thought he'd be so happy to have his throat free. He took a moment to swallow, free of dick, and breathe deeply to settle his tear ducts. _Okay… lesson one, restrain hips… got it…_ He was so glad he was a quick study.

"Sasuke?"

He didn't want the blonde to think, and though he was glad of the moment Naruto had taken to think about him, Sasuke wasn't about to let him wake up from the lustful haze. With renewed vigor, Sasuke gripped Naruto's hips and sunk back down half way.

"Oh, sweet fuck…" Again those hips tried to snap forward, and this time Sasuke resisted. It was a small struggle but he won, and then he put his practice to work.

Naruto was a gasping, cursing, groaning mess, and Sasuke was no better as he lapped at the member, learning its every ridge and flavor, as cum leaked out to paint Sasuke's tongue. There was far more saliva and other fluids than Sasuke had imagined there to be and he had to swallow often to keep it from slipping down his chin. That was only appealing visually and didn't feel good for him.

Naruto didn't seem to mind as the constricting heat and massage he received with each gulp. Feeling braver, Sasuke sank lower. The heat and girth still made him burn, but it wasn't painful. With that in mind, he finally started to bob his head.

"Fuck… oh god ,oh god…" Naruto chanted, fingers slipping from his shoulder to trace up his neck. The caress made his skin tingle and the sensation shot down his spine to his lower back where his own desire pooled. Sasuke was leaking all over the insides of his shorts, his thighs were trembling and he'd started to rock just to get some friction on his own need. He wanted to come so badly, but he had to have Naruto first.

That hand traced over his chin and cheeks to rest on his lips and then they froze feeling his own dick slide in and out of those lips. "_Yes…_ Fuck Sasuke… little Sasuke is… oh god!"

Sasuke could feel the tremors in the body before him and he lowered his hand to paw softly at the tightening sack as his head bobbed up and down, the thick engorged prick sliding deep into his throat, out to tease his tongue and back again. Long fingers urged him faster and Sasuke followed the demands, used to the sensation and prepared for the invasion.

Naruto's pleasure was nothing but harsh gasps and twitching limbs and Sasuke felt his own loins tighten. Hell, he was going to get off just sucking Naruto off, and somehow, that was just fine with him.

The main vein under his tongue started to throb rhythmically and Sasuke braced himself, knowing that that meant Naruto was about to come. The thought made his body tighten and he felt his own end approaching. He pulled back once ready to take him full to the hilt on his next downward motion, his hands lightly cupped the balls and rolled them and—

Bright light flooded his vision.

Sasuke would have liked to believe it was his orgasm that did that, but it was the actual lights flickering back on. The shock had him jerking off the penis entirely, and his hand gripped a bit at the balls, his own orgasm brought about by the shock.

"Uh!" Naruto cried out and Sasuke was further shocked when thick hot gobs smacked him in the face. He blinked as the sticky liquid ran over his cheeks, the bridge of his nose, his sore lips, and clumped some on his bangs. Sasuke blinked his own body already relaxing, his cum leaking out of the legs of his shorts to stain the floor.

Naruto stood shaking before him, face flushed, those scars standing out like white stripes upon reddened cheeks. Golden hair was plastered to a damp, sweat beaded face, and his mouth was open gasping for air. His clothes were rumpled, his pants and boxers half off of his ass, and his cock—oh sweet mother of god, it was dark color and still slightly hard and twitching—was resting, glistening with his saliva, and suddenly Sasuke felt ill.

_Oh shit… what have I done?_ Panic set in as suddenly he realized what a stupid idea this had been. _Naruto's going to come out of his daze and… he's going to hate me… he's going to…_ Sasuke wasn't sure what Naruto would do actually. He could just ignore it and return to treating him like a child, though it was kind of hard to do that when said child was covered in said man's cum.

Still undecided on just what the blonde would do, Sasuke sat, feeling dirty and foolish. _Damn it! This… this won't end well, what the fuck was I thinking? Fuck I practically raped him…. Didn't he say no a time or two?_

In his worry he didn't notice the way blue eyes were regarding him, or the way the hand still in his hair had yet to move, and when he licked his lips tasting more of Naruto's essence, he missed the way those pupils dilated out and the currently semi hard penis twitched with renewed interest.

_Shit, shit, shit! What am I going to do? What if he tells Itachi? Awe, shit I really blew this one right to hell—_

"Fuck it." Naruto's words startled Sasuke out of his mental rant and he jerked his head up sharply.

"W—what?" His voice croaked and Sasuke was mortified by it. His face turned hot instantly and he nearly missed the soft caress Naruto gave his cheek as his hand slid out of his hair. Ignoring his reaction Naruto pulled Sasuke up to his feet, and Sasuke could feel his own desire run down his leg. Worse yet, Naruto looked down to watch it, face unreadable.

Tears sprang from nowhere and burned at his eyes, but Sasuke wouldn't let them fall. Gritting his teeth he squared off against the blonde, closing his eyes tightly as though he could block the whole experience from his mind. "I—I didn't… er.. what the hell do you expect from me you stupid dobe! I'm not a child anymore! What do I have to do, hang a fucking sign above my head? God, you…you just don't get it you stupid—" He broke off abruptly when Naruto pulled him sharply forward.

His legs were still unstable from his orgasm and he fell against the taller male. His smell was stronger and far more intoxicating, and Sasuke fingers curled into the shirtfront instinctively. Damn it, he hated that Naruto could do this to him, and yet he couldn't truly hate the blonde for it.

A strong hand turned his face up, and before Sasuke could jerk away to try to babble out some other argument, large full lips were embracing his own. Sasuke melted instantly, when a hot tongue swept against his own puffy and used ones.

Teeth nibbled softly at his flesh, causing his lips to part in a gasp. The tongue soothed the abrasion and passed into his mouth, exploring the orifice it's owner just thoroughly fucked. Naruto's taste ran between them mixed with the sour after taste of candy. So Naruto had been sneaking some himself.

Cheater.

Hands slowly eased over his body, crushing him close as the mouth slanted for a deeper, fuller kiss. Sasuke was trembling, full to nearly bursting with hope and fear. _What is this… what the hell is this? _He knew what it felt like, but he'd spent so long convincing himself that it wasn't possible that now he simply didn't know what to think.

Finally Naruto pulled back with a gentle kiss, hands cupping his messy face. Opening his eyes—he couldn't recall closing them—Sasuke warily looked up into bright blue eyes, and nearly balked at the smirk.

The fucking bastard was pleased with himself. He'd just taken Sasuke on an emotional roller coaster from hell, and now he had the balls to gloat about it? His darkening look must have prompted Naruto because suddenly the blonde was talking once more. "I was trying so hard you know, fucking brat."

"Hn. What the hell does that even mean?"

Blue burned like the center of a fire and Sasuke felt his insides curl with desire. God he was such a fucking Uke, it was humiliating, but damn it if he didn't want to just collapse right there and let Naruto have his way with him.

He was truly pathetic.

"What it means, _Sasuke_," His name was officially a sin, "is; you play with fire, little boy, you will get burned…"

His Jaw dropped, unsure of how to take that threat, because it was defiantly a threat. The grip on his arms, the face inches from his own, and the press of a fully erect penis pushing against his slickened thigh. _Oh please punish me…_ Sasuke was glad he didn't actually say it out loud, he'd have to kill Naruto and then himself if he had, those kinds of comments were for his inner fantasies only, and Naruto would _never _find out about those.

He trembled when Naruto shot him that fox like grin, and then turned, his hand gripping his wrist to pull him toward the stairs. He didn't seem to care that his junk was hanging loose, his hard on bobbing with each step, the mess left in the living room, or even the possible trick or treaters who might have had the sense to go out with a car. Honestly though, if anyone was still demanding candy after the storm, they were hard core psychos.

The trip up the stairs was quick, uneventful, and filled with silence, same with the trek down the hall and into the room that was freezing cold.

"Shit!" Naruto let go of him to run across the room, pants falling lower with the movement. Sasuke watched feeling guilt and something completely tender well up when he saw Naruto shut the window and grab a towel to soak up the water on the carpet. _I love this man…_ Sasuke thought and wrapped his arms around his middle. _This orange loving idiot… is mine._

Still shaking a bit, Naruto turned back to him and rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, that was a mood killer."

"Hn." He doubted he could voice anything more.

Naruto smirked at him, as if he knew and drew close once more. "Lets see if I can fix that…" He kissed his ear lobe gently; arms encircling his form, running fingers up and down his spine, making him arch and grasp the taller man closer to him. One of those hands slipped lower still to curve over his ass, fingers tracing the line where the shorts came just a bit too short. His skin sparked at the contact.

One large thigh pushed between his own and he rubbed himself against the body shivering as lips and tongue traced the shell of his ear. Sasuke had always thought it impossible to actually mewl, and yet he found himself doing just that as those kisses gave way to teeth, and then a hot breath as Naruto whispered to him. "You look so good covered in my passion, Sasuke. So, damned good."

Oh, hell, his inner slut completely took over and he clung to Naruto whimpering and kissing and pushing closer. Anything to get Naruto to use him and just keep touching him until he couldn't tell which way was up anymore.

"Oh, so you like that?"

"Uhn."

"I'll take that as a yes." Naruto chuckled and then promptly sat down, pulling Sasuke into his lap. The new position was startling, but he adjusted swiftly. Relaxing, and straddling the older boy. Naruto was smiling up at him as this position placed him slightly taller than the blonde. The smile made him feel as though he were the most important thing in the world. It was pleasing, though Sasuke still had the sense to realize that this was probably nothing more than sex. But, that was fine. So long as he got to have Naruto, he didn't mind. At least, that was what he told himself.

"You know, I do like this costume, still pissed you wore it outside though." Naruto frowned, both hands sliding down to cup his butt. His fingertips ran over the seam of the shorts and Sasuke pushed back against them when they grazed his opening through the fabric.

Yep, he was defiantly a bottom, and he didn't give a damn about it.

"I'm starting to think, you were baiting me." Naruto's words were sugary sweet which belayed the sudden jerk up on his cloth tail. Sasuke let out an indignant squawk as the shorts rode even higher up his ass, the fabric pinching up between his ass-cheeks and pinching his balls a little. He flopped forward, dropping down until his face was buried in Naruto's shoulder, fingers clutching the shirt front in a death grip. "… were you baiting me Sasuke?"

Fingers traced over the newly bared flesh and he couldn't stop the gasp that escaped at the sensual touch. His insides were molten again, and his nerves were shot and useless. How was he supposed to concentrate; to answer that accusation when the older boy insisted on doing things like that.

Full lips brushed against his ear lobe and the curl of breath tickled his skin. "Well Sasuke?"

"N… nothing else… seemed to work—" he broke off on a gasp when one of those fingers—from a hand that he swore never moved and yet must have to first find the lube and then subsequently get lathered with it—pushed the bunched cloth aside to slip along his crease and pause to rest against his hole. Where had he gotten the lube from? Seriously, was he hiding it in his pants pocket or under the pillows somewhere? Sasuke had only a minute to ponder this before that finger sank in deep.

"Oh!" He hated that little sound, but there was nothing to be done about it now that it was air-born, and Naruto was grinning like a fool from it, swirling the digit momentarily before thrusting it in and out on his hole. Sasuke's body trembled from the sensory over load and lay gasping against Naruto's neck as his other hand held that cloth aside for his lubed hand to continue to finger-fuck him.

He felt the digit push in and pull out, the skin warm; almost super-heated from his insides. Dizzily, he wondered how it was possible to be that hot inside, but the thought was stolen with yet another insistent push inside. Naruto grunted the sound an echo through the chest Sasuke was pressed to. He felt it more than he heard it and then Naruto's muscles bunched a bit, the slick finger pulling out to hold his hips as Naruto moved them both back, further onto the bed.

The bed made a straining noise; springs protesting the added weight, and the bed sheets bunched as Naruto's jeans pulled further down and Sasuke's wet boots snagged the soft comforter. It was blue, surprisingly, and made of some soft thick cotton that Sasuke could picture curling up in and never coming out of again.

He let his knees scrub against the material a bit, enjoying the sensation it made when his boots clung to the material as Naruto settled below him. The blond shifted and grunted, lifting his hips several times as those hands left Sasuke's person, then the legs were kicking and a soft drop of cloth let Sasuke know that Naruto had removed his pants.

A sharp fissure of lust stabbed through his lower gut, and Sasuke attempted to look down, but it was as he made the movement that the hands returned. A hot Palm covered one cheek, pulling the fabric with greedy fingers from the hole the other hand pushed two more digits into gleefully.

The lube had rubbed off of his fingers and the entrance was a little rough, but Sasuke didn't mind in the least. He pushed back against the invasion, consumed by the knowledge that this was Naruto. His brother's best friend was holding him like a lover, was preparing him to be taken, because why else would he shove lubed fingers up his ass if all the idiot wanted to do was rub off on him? And, even if this was nothing more than sex, it was precious to him, because this was the person he loved most.

He'd have no regrets.

Naruto was now reclined against his pillows and his face was flushed a startling red, blue eyes deep and dark with his desire. His whole form shifted with his arm as he moved those two insistent fingers in and out of him. His hand twisted and the fingers wiggled a bit, stretching Sasuke more. Sasuke tipped his head back, crying out and felt Naruto press a needy kiss to his brow.

"Fuck… Sasuke… I can't believe… I have Itachi's baby brother… riding my fingers…" He moaned then and began to kiss his chin and ear. The kisses were messy and sloppy and left Sasuke tingling. He angled his head back for more of the contact and pushed back on the fingers that continued to invade him.

Another twist here, a push there, scrape, tug, roll. Sasuke was panting and lost in the sensations and hardly noticed when he started rubbing himself against Naruto's own erection. It was instinctual, to relieve the pressure in his too tight shorts, and grounding down on the fingers felt so good, he didn't even think about the way his wet shorts would feel upon a bared hard on.

Apparently, Naruto did.

Naruto growled suddenly, fingers leaving Sasuke's hole—he moaned at the loss and clamped down on air hoping that the other would return to fill him—and he swiftly rolled them. The contact his side made with the mattress startled Sasuke, as did the sudden movement as Naruto slid free of his sweat shirt. Sasuke still held the orange Jack-o-lantern thing in white knuckles, staring up at the older boy in awe. Naruto was wearing a plain black shirt which was just as quickly thrown to join the pants.

Naruto was a bronze being of toned plains and hard muscle. Sasuke felt his insides flame even more and his erection throbbed harshly in his constrictive shorts. He wanted them off, and he wanted them off now, but Naruto stopped him from reaching down, as a hard hand pushed him back to his knees.

Sasuke's heart hammered in his chest, his breath frozen in his lungs as his arms—still full of abandoned cloth—pressed against his chest, his face buried in the soft comforter. He wanted to know what Naruto was planning, but couldn't find the strength to simply speak. His legs trembled as he was propped up and again those hand pulled his shorts.

"Ow!"

The tugging stopped, and Sasuke twitched as the tightness around his balls ceased to pinch. He breathed again as Naruto leaned over and a hot hand cupped his front. "If I release you, will you promise not to touch yourself?"

The fucker was a god-damned sadist!

He had very little options though, considering he wanted Naruto to continue, and he wanted his dick out of the constrictive material, so, with and glare over his shoulder—which was severely undermined by the way he shivered when Naruto rubbed him, finger gently pinching around his tip—he replied. "If you get on with it and fuck me already."

It was not breathy and he did not whimper and the end of his sentence and that was final.

Naruto chuckled. "Of course, baby." He kissed his temple while Sasuke gaped at him mildly horrified. _Baby? Baby? Oh, hell no!_

"I'm not a god damned ba—" His pants released, the zipper freeing his need and it bounced free, scraping against Naruto's wrist and the blonde gave it a few teasing strokes in greeting before pulling away.

Okay, this time, he did whimper.

"Shh, I'm getting there…" the pause was on purpose, letting him know that Naruto had heard his complaint, and that though he would refrain from calling him that, he wasn't going to stop with the ridiculous pet names. That was fine. Pet names he could deal with. He just didn't want another damned comment on his age.

"… Relax." Naruto breathed, pushing up his mesh shirt with his nose to kiss at his spine while one hand again tugged the shorts aside. Why he didn't just remove them was beyond Sasuke, though he was starting to think Naruto really was a kinky bastard. Well, that worked fine with him, most of his fantasies had a bit of kink to them anyway.

Trying to do as he was told, Sasuke let his legs fall further apart, his face buried in the fabric that still smelled strongly of the blonde and focused on relaxing his ass. He'd found that slightly pushing out with his hips tended to open him a bit and so he tried that now.

"God, Itachi's brother all laid out before me… shit, I am so going to hell for this…"

Sasuke smirked into the bedding, enjoying the desire he heard in that tone, and then he was gasping as something far larger than fingers—also lubed without Sasuke's notice, he had to find out how the blonde did that—pushed against him. For several minutes, his body wouldn't give, and Naruto stilled. Fear that he would stop made Sasuke tense up and tilt his head to the side to tell him to keep going, but those hands were soothing up his sides, rubbing his spine, tracing his neck and nape, the shell of his ear the plains of his stomach. "Sasuke." The voice whispered as the hand wrapped around him and pumped.

"Ah!" Sasuke's hips snapped to and he started the thrust ignoring how each time he pulled his hips back, Naruto's tip slipped a little deeper.

"That's it… Sasuke." Naruto moaned and placed more kisses to his exposed back, and even through the mesh on his shoulders. "Open up for me… yes, just like that." Naruto praised him as his hand pulled and his lips wandered. He hardly noticed when the other hand curled over his hip until Naruto pulled up with a grunt and suddenly he _pushed_.

Deeper and deeper, he sunk and Sasuke could do nothing but whine as that horrible, wonderful, burning heat, forged inside. He was so full by the time heavy balls rested against his own, now hanging loose from an open pant leg, that he found it hard to breathe.

"Sasuke… you need to loosen up." Naruto breathed, once more draped over him, a large palm rubbing his overly filled lower belly in comforting circles.

"C—can't…"

"Shh… you can." Naruto's kisses again peppered his skin, the hand soothing his belly, tips of his fingers brushing against his length sending sparks of pleasure over his skin. The ministrations seemed to do very little for a long time, but slowly, he realized he had adjusted to it and was breathing a little easier. It was then that Naruto gently rotated his hips.

"Ah-ah!" Sasuke let out, shuddering anew when the dick inside him twisted a bit rubbing along his tight walls and striking his prostate. "Naruto!" He cried out breathlessly, pushing his hips back, feeling the bunched fabric of his shorts press against his left butt- cheek. Perverse desire made his spine tingle and he rubbed against Naruto to better feel the bite of those god-awful shorts.

"That's it…Uhn! Yeah… that's it Sasuke…" Naruto panted a bit, both hands holding him steady as those hips continued to gyrate a bit. Sasuke's breath was labored again and he kept his head tilted to bring in more of the chilled air that now felt so very good on his face. "Let's try something new… eh?"

"Huh?" Sasuke managed out just before those comforting hands moved to his hips and Naruto started to thrust. "Ah!" His fingers locked tightly in the shirt and his back bowed as he tried to push his ass further into the air as that large erection began to slide in and out of him. It was slick, hot and large, and Sasuke couldn't stop himself from clenching down around it every time Naruto pulled back.

The pressure made Naruto grunt and snap his hips back harder which pressed the shorts harsher against his ass, and bruised his insides as Naruto's balls slapped his own in an erotic greeting. Sasuke was in heaven, and every nerve was crying out as his own pre-cum leaked out to drizzle down his own needy dick, but true to his word, he did not touch it.

His sweat was causing the once comfortable comforter to cling to him, and his hair to stick to his face and neck. It trailed his thighs and made the skin under him slick. Naruto's own moisture fell like random raindrops—like the storm outside—upon him with each hard thrust and it was perfect.

And then the idiot pulled all the way out.

"W—what?" Sasuke began, and managed to open his eyes and see the intense look on Naruto's face before the blonde was repositioning him again. He was rolled to his side, then back and his arms flopped open, one still entangled in orange. "Naruto…" He reached out to him a bit and those thick lips grinned at him before capturing his own in a tender kiss.

Sasuke laid back and participated in the gentle lip play when he felt those hands begin to remove his dirtied shorts. That was fine with him, he didn't want the cloth between them anymore either. Naruto carefully lifted him up, sliding the shorts free, scraping over hyper sensitive skin, and then over the boots.

_Wait… over?_ Sasuke blinked and pulled away from the distracting lips and found Naruto smirking at him.

"What? It's hot." Was the only explanation he received before the shorts were tossed aside and Sasuke was again moved to his side, Naruto capturing his leg as he straddled to other. "Ready?"

Swallowing, Sasuke wondered if he was. When the blond had positioned him, his balls had clenched in anticipation and there was a good chance he would lose his load right then and there when that penis breached him once more. He nodded anyway.

"Good." And Naruto was filling him again. His first ring of muscle protested but after the initial push he slid in with ease, and again Sasuke was bouncing on a thick hard cock , his thigh being bitten, licked, and kissed as Naruto's balls slid over his other thigh and the edge of his boot. As he'd expected it was an emotional and sensational overload, and Sasuke could do nothing but cry out as his body tensed and he released his load all over the blankets.

"_Ah!_" His throat ached, and his butt burned a bit as Naruto continued to pump through his spamming muscles, and it drew out his orgasm. He was left twitching slightly as his breathing calmed and it was then that he noticed that Naruto hadn't finished and was still sliding in and out of him at a steady pace. "N—naruto?"

"Shh… relax, it's okay." Naruto breathed his own voice unsteady as he kissed the tender inside of his knee. His body was still hyper sensitive, and the actions were still rather pleasant even without the aching erection. No longer distracted by his own lust, Sasuke realized that this position allowed Naruto to penetrate him deeper and he slid over his prostate often.

The tingle in his belly returned even though his erection had not. It would though, he was certain of that, and as he whimpered, body coming back alive around him, returning to the heated wonder of abandon, Sasuke couldn't help but cry slightly from it all. _Dear god never let this end…_ He felt and felt, and Naruto was inside of him, and around him and Sasuke never wanted to wake up.

"Gnuh… Sasuke… I need…" Naruto started but gave up talking quickly. He stopped thrusting while still buried balls deep and carefully maneuvered Sasuke's leg out from under him and twisted him around to lie on his back, legs spread wantonly around Naruto's hips. "Sweet fucking hell yes…" Naruto praised, releasing his leg and bending low to embrace him. Sasuke had never realized how intense a simple hold could feel, as those fingers tangled with his own and simultaneously caressed his face before Naruto kissed him. His tongue laved at his lips as those hips started anew and Sasuke's startled gasp let that tongue slide in deep, kissing him as though he could pull his breath straight from his lungs.

Treasured.

At that moment, that was how he felt, and as those hips snapped back and forth, rolling against his prostate renewing his ardor and trapping his new erection between the sweaty press of their bellies, Sasuke dared to believe that this was love. Lips parted from his only to press messy kisses into his cheeks, ears, and chin. A tongue traced his neck where the collar didn't cover and he arched against the other, his free arm clutching at Naruto's shoulder, both legs wrapping around hips and cried out again, and again.

"Sasuke. Sasuke. Sasuke." Naruto chanted with each thrust, the sound of his own name burned him deeper than the act itself could ever hope to, and the tears continued to fall. He loved this man, loved him so much and he would never get enough of this.

"Naruto…" He returned when the invading erection didn't steal the breath from him with the demanding pounding of hips. Like a switch, Naruto again gripped him tightly and rolled them and Sasuke let out a muffled squawk when he found himself straddling Naruto as the blonde reclined on his back, hands gripping his hips loosely. He had a feeling he knew where this was going.

Or he thought he did, until the hands moved up and pushed the shirt up and off of his head completely. _Okay… that was a lot of work just to get rid of my shirt…_ Sasuke thought, lifting a mocking eyebrow at the blonde. He really was an idiot. The sense of control was now his, and Sasuke leaned forward to kiss the blonde when the other started talking again, fingers grazing the collar and large silver bell on his neck.

"With the storm outside, I can't hear your sucking ass as I take you." The crass words made him flush straight to his toes and ruined his sense of control. Naruto just smiled and pulled him down by the collar to kiss him. "But with this…" and he pushed his hips up startling Sasuke with the new depth and making him rock. The sharp trill of the bell finally reached his ears. "… I can still hear myself fucking you." Naruto finished with a lustful grin, and Sasuke shivered.

The damned thing must have been ringing the whole time they'd been active, and yet, this was the first time he'd noticed it, and now, the sound made the whole experience more intense. _Is that why Naruto pointed it out?_ Sasuke didn't have to wonder long as Naruto began to explore his chest and stomach with fingers, lips, and tongue and his reactions caused the bell to chime again. His body tensed and he was mortified to find himself mewling and rolling his hips in circles to feel Naruto deep inside him. Naruto, of course, grinned against his skin like a fox.

Yes. He mentioned the bell on purpose.

Sasuke couldn't decide if that pissed him off or turned him on.

"Ride me." Naruto whispered against a nipple as Sasuke decided he was turned on and mewled again like a whore at the mere idea. "You like that, huh?" Naruto's hands slid to his hips and held him tight, his head moving back until he was again lying flat on his back, looking up at Sasuke. "The thought of pleasuring me turns you on." Naruto stated and pushed up again with his hips.

"Ah!" Sasuke's head tipped back and the bell chimed.

"Come on Sasuke." Naruto urged again. "I'm not moving again. You'll have to fuck yourself on my cock if you want to finish."

Yep. A sadist.

Flushing with indignant embarrassment—and a large dose of lust—Sasuke planted his hands on the chest below him and lifted his hips. He didn't get far before he dropped back down. The feeling was intense especially since it was his will and force that controlled the motions, and suddenly the embarrassment was completely gone.

Naruto, though being a crass and kinky fuck, had just placed them on equal footing. Sasuke was in charge of their love making now. He would decide the pace, and the speed, and when he wanted to continue. It was heady, the power high he got from that knowledge that Naruto was willing to let him lead in this, and he looked down at smiling blue eyes and smirked, rising to the challenge. _I am more than a match for you, dobe._

He forced his body to move. Up, down, up, down, twist, roll, up, down. His breathing was labored at the strain and his arms were shaking with the effort to keep himself going, but Naruto's hands helped to steady him. They remained in place but never once did they try to change the pace or the movement.

Sasuke took his time, learning his own body through Naruto, and all the while the bell tolled, reminding him that they were fucking. That a part of Naruto was deep inside him by choice and was enjoying every moment of their time together. Too soon, his arms gave out and he collapsed against Naruto's chest rubbing his erection into sweaty skin and rocking on the cock still deeply inside.

It wasn't enough.

Fuck, it wasn't fair that it wasn't enough, and Sasuke whimpered, clinging to Naruto's shoulders. It was nice to know that he felt that they were equals, and he certainly wanted to try this again, but right now he just wanted to come, and to feel Naruto come deep inside of him, but voicing all that would be impossible in his current state.

"… Can't… anymore… please… please…" He hoped to god Naruto understood that because he really couldn't be more specific.

"Okay." Naruto gasped, and again, Sasuke found himself on his back, the bell screaming as Naruto loomed over him pounding him into the mattress. "So good, so good… fuck Sasuke… close…" Naruto mumbled, his lips pressing and then just resting so he could pant against Sasuke's open mouth, then his ear, and shoulder, and—_sweet merciful fuck_—the bell was screaming in his ear, and Sasuke was clutching at sweaty shoulders that pushed and rolled as the arms gripped and held him. One moved continuously up and down his back, the other tangled fingers with his own and they were so close…

Close…

Close…

Sasuke felt as though his world exploded into tiny pieces around him, destroyed by the repercussions of the damned bell as they rang out continuously around them. He vaguely heard Naruto groan out his name, as he was keening the blonde's own at a pitch that would have been humiliating if he wasn't so high on pleasure, and then he felt the hot flood of release in his bowels. It wasn't as pleasant as he imagined, but neither was it disgusting. It was simply different.

Naruto trembled when he pulled free and then collapse on him, and Sasuke grunted, attempting to breath past the dead weight crushing him while dealing with the sensation of having cum dribbling out from inside him. Naruto reeked of sweat, musk and sex, and strangely enough, a little like himself. Sasuke didn't mind so much, in fact it was pleasing, but he was already sore and his brain had been without normal oxygen flow for long enough, thank you.

With a pout, he attempted to shove the blonde off of him, and received a sudden and swift hug instead. "Naruto…" He began, ready to start pinching the other, when Naruto rolled them to their sides and cuddled Sasuke even closer—not unlike he used to do when they were both much smaller—and whispered, gently, softly, and still in the post orgasmic bliss, "I love you."

Sasuke's heart constricted and he froze in those arms. Love? He wanted it desperately, but he knew better than to expect something like that so swiftly. He knew that it was the sex talking that Naruto meant to say, 'I love this', and that made it hurt. He wanted that so badly, and to hear it but know it was mistake…

"Sasuke?" Naruto pulled back a bit to look into his face, and Sasuke couldn't find the strength to turn away, even when that face pinched in concern. "Hey… what's…" Hands lifted to cup his face, thumbs soothing the puffy under-lids—because he was not crying again damn it—before he took on his commanding voice. "Don't give me that look, bastard. I know you enjoyed this too."

Sasuke closed his eyes against the sting and nodded his head. No, he had wanted this, and he had to prove he was adult enough to handle a relationship without attachments. That was what this was after all, a onetime thing.

"Sasuke…" Naruto was whining now, and he suddenly found himself cuddled closer, his ear pressed to a strong chest where Naruto's heart beat soothingly. He relaxed and looped his own arms around Naruto's narrow waist. "Come on. I know you wanted this, and I know you love me too, so stop making things difficult, you brat."

It was the insult that made him react.

"I am not a brat! I can handle this you stupid dobe! Stop treating me like a fucking child when you just fucked me!" He was struggling but the blonde wasn't about to let him go. So, he bit him.

"Ow! God- damn it Sasuke, if you're such an adult you should know the term, 'post-orgasmic cuddling'." Naruto snapped rolling back atop of him and crushing him silent. "Fuck that stung…"

Sasuke turned his head away, eyes held shut as he tried not to react. Not to cry and pitch another fit, because he simply couldn't do that, and yet his emotions were so mixed up he simply couldn't handle it. Maybe this hadn't been such a good idea. He didn't want to let the dobe go. Naruto was his now, and he simply couldn't pretend not to be possessive now.

"Sasuke, come on now, stop it." Naruto urged quietly, his lips kissing his temple. It was soft and sweet, and had nothing to do with sex. The hope it caused was torture and he turned back, well aware that his expression must have shown how broken he was. "Oh, baby, no…" Naruto's own face crumbled and he bent low over him.

"Don't call me—" Sasuke stopped thinking when those lips procured his own. The kiss was tender, sweet, and anything but platonic. Naruto tasted him deeply, loving his mouth with a precision of one trying to memorize every inch of a place they already knew to be precious.

Precious.

Sasuke relaxed into the kiss, returning the gentle play until with a final lick to his own tongue Naruto retreated, only to place several short chaste kisses to already swollen lips. After the eighth one, Sasuke found himself laughing a little. "I get it, I get it, idiot." He complained, tilting his head and getting the ninth and tenth on his ear.

"Well, now that you are listening, care to return my affections?" Naruto asked, and once more rolled them to their sides. Sasuke was utterly baffled.

_What does he mean? Does he want me to kiss him?_ Slightly red, he leaned in and began another slow and languid kiss.

"Hmm, that is nice." Naruto murmured when he pulled back, and Sasuke smirked, proud of himself. "But that's not what I meant."

"What the hell do you mean?" Sasuke said, irritated with this game. Naruto rolled his eyes and stroked his shoulder lovingly.

"I know you love me, Sasuke, I would very much like to hear you say it though."

He was dark red in moments.

"Bastard." Naruto chuckled, and nuzzled him a bit, hands wandering down to remove the boots and he sat up to throw them from the bed, before gathering Sasuke close and pulling them both under the blankets. "… that's better."

"… I…"Sasuke muttered and Naruto gave him his stupid look, the one that made him look deceptively innocent.

"What was that?"

"… I said…" Sasuke scowled. "I don't know why you love me."

Blue eyes regarded him in silence, before he smiled and rolled onto his back, his arms pulling Sasuke half on top of him. The blonde was apparently clingy after sex. "Well, if you must know, I've been in love with you since you were eight years old."

Right, cause that wasn't weird at all.

Naruto laughed at his expression and ruffled his hair some. "Not like that, bastard. I'm no Pedophile."

Sasuke remained quiet and Naruto smacked his shoulder.

"Seriously, though. Do you remember my first birthday I had here?"

"No." Sasuke really couldn't, but then again, in his mind Naruto had always been around and they had always celebrated his birthday with Itachi and he.

"Huh. Well, I do. I was all alone because Itachi and I were still not that close of friends yet, and my grandparents were away in Germany." Naruto began, his fingers migrating to Sasuke's dark locks and running through them. It was a pleasant feeling, the soft scrap of nails and fingers on his scalp, and Sasuke could have laid there forever so long as Naruto kept doing that. "I was feeling rather pathetic and down when you came by and asked me what the matter was."

"Okay…" He still didn't see how this lead to his loving Sasuke.

"After I told you, you gave me your orange from your lunch sack, told me I could have it since I liked 'gross' food. Then, you dragged me to your house to bake me a cake." Naruto finished with a loving smile.

Sasuke wanted to die from humiliation.

_Did I really… oh my god how embarrassing…_ Sasuke blinked trying to rid himself of the horrific picture Naruto painted of him. It didn't help that he vaguely recalled baking cakes with the blonde. _No wonder Itachi always picked on me…_

"That was the nicest thing anyone had done for me since my parents died. I know my grandparents try to be there for me, and they love me but… well, they couldn't be bothered to do something so small, and yet, you did. After that, you always came to get me on my birthday, Sasuke. Even when we fought, you cared." Naruto was looking at him again, his eyes so warm and loving that Sasuke feared he might just melt like some sappy girl.

Naruto kissed him once more, lovingly, slowly, and Sasuke finally believed him. With a sigh as lips parted, Sasuke breathed out his secret.

"I love you."

"That's very good to hear." Naruto said with a grin, still holding him. "You know, I was trying so hard not to just steal you away before someone could become dear to you." Naruto confessed, still playing with his hair. How the idiot could be so blunt was a mystery sort of like his lubricating skills. Sasuke absently wondered where the tube was hidden now. "Guess that was blown to bits…" Another kiss, this one possessive and consuming, and Sasuke couldn't be bothered to care if he melted or not, or where the mysterious lube went to. "You're mine now."

Sasuke nodded sleepily in agreement, allowing Naruto to cuddle and kiss him, those fingers stroking over his sated flesh and drawing him deeper into sleep. _Sure… we'll go with that…for now._

XXX

The doorbell woke him up.

Sasuke stretched and rolled over at the sound, enjoying the warmth of the bed sheets, and winced at the soreness in his back and hips. For a moment, he paused, wondering what the hell that was about—he had managed to tear his meniscus once before in his sleep(1) so he supposed anything was possible—before his eyes flew wide open when his memory returned. _Oh my god… I had sex with Naruto… Naruto loves me… we're…. we're…_ Okay so he wasn't certain what they were at the moment, but they sure as hell weren't platonic anymore.

What was certain to be a very sappy grin, spread over Sasuke's face as he looked around Naruto's room from the comfort of the bed sheets and blue comforter. The room was eerily clean and absent one blonde idiot, but it was still pleasing to see, and Sasuke snuggled deeper into the pillow beside him. _Naruto probably got up to get the door. _Sasuke rationalized, and very quickly realized that Itachi would probably be the one who rang.

Shit, what would his brother think of this? Should he stay up here or go down and help Naruto fight for their right to be together? As sappy as it sounded, he knew he would want help when facing the older brother of his lover. Then again, Sasuke was certain Itachi loved Naruto more than he loved Sasuke, so, maybe it would all work out.

Deciding he'd remained in bed long enough, Sasuke sat up to get dressed and froze when he noticed two things. The bed sheets were clean and dry, and he was dressed in his costume, which was also, clean and dry if a little sleep rumpled. _What the fuck?_

Sasuke was stunned trying to figure out how Naruto could have washed and dried the clothes and bedding without Sasuke noticing, and was forced to believe that maybe he had dreamed the whole thing up. Sure he was sore, but that could be because his pleather shorts were again riding up his ass, and sleeping on mesh would cause some problems he guessed. Looking down he found his boots nice and tidy beside the dresser, where his kitty ears and collar rested on top.

_A dream…_ A deep sense of cold filled him, and Sasuke flopped back down hiding under the blankets. _This fucking sucks! When the hell did I fall asleep?_ He contemplated going back to unconsciousness, but decided that leaving later would be just as awkward as leaving now, and would make little difference on the whole.

Getting up and putting his shoes back on Sasuke pulled the fabric from his butt, and was struck again by the smooth clean feeling of the skin. Nope, he would have definitely woken up if Naruto had bathed him, with that in mind, he clomped down the stairs and into the living room.

"Ah, so he is still alive." Itachi stated dryly from the doorway. He was wearing black jeans and a sweatshirt. He obviously didn't have work today, somehow, that made his mood worse.

"Fuck you."

"Sasuke, how many times must I tell you? That is illegal." Itachi was grinning when Sasuke flipped him off and stalked to the door where his candy bag lay innocently. He couldn't even remember bringing it into Naruto's house to begin with. Seeming to realize he wasn't going to get another rise from him, Itachi turned back to his friend.

Naruto, who was wearing his sweatpants and that black shirt from his dream, and was looking far too appetizing for his own good, simply smiled at the two of them. Damn it, now he needed to go home and jerk off. If he didn't love the man, he would hate him so damned much. _If I get carpel tunnel in my wrist he's paying for the surgery._

"Sorry for the inconvenience." Itachi began, and Sasuke flinched. It had been so nice in the dream, that feeling of being equal, not a child or a burden, and now it was all just a fantasy.

"Naw, Sasuke's welcome over anytime."

He couldn't bear to look at Naruto just then, and so he headed for the door. He nearly plowed straight into Itachi who blocked the entryway. He didn't bother to look up. "Move."

"Hn. See you around Naruto." Itachi replied kindly stepping away and outside. Sasuke had almost escaped, when a warm hand fell on his shoulder and squeezed tightly. He froze up, heart fluttering as Naruto's body heat rushed over him. Warm breath tickled the shell of his ear; the voice jovial and seductive.

"Come back to play again soon, _Sasuke._" The suggestive tone was doubled when Naruto's other hand passed over his ass in a lingering caress.

Sasuke's jaw dropped.

_It was real… _Joy filled his chest and he almost started to grin when a troubling thought struck him. _How the fucking hell did he manage to clean everything up without waking me?_ He had turned to demand an answer, seeing smug blue eyes glittering at him, when Itachi interrupted him. Most likely on purpose.

"Sasuke, get over here before you get arrested for indecent exposure."

Sasuke wanted to tell him to fuck off, but the grin Naruto gave him, promised that there would be a later time, and it was confirmed by his next words. "See you later…Baby."

The horrid nickname would stay it seemed. Well if the blonde wanted to choose such an unappealing and insulting pet name, then he'd play along as well.

He scowled and turned away, "Pedophile."

"Hey!" Naruto's cry made him grin and he bolted passed Itachi and into the house, feeling lighter than he had in a long while. Running up the stairs, regardless of his shoes and Itachi's yell for him to slow down, Sasuke burst into his room and collapsed on his bed.

He really didn't want to have to thank Kiba for this stupid situation, but he had the feeling he might just have to, and looking up and out of his window at the other room, where the orange curtain billowed, Sasuke found he really didn't mind so much.

Maybe next time he could try out his fantasy of being fucked against a table in his school uniform. _Or maybe the girl's uniform._ Sasuke smirked.

Sakura might loan him one.

**Extra:**

"You planned that."

"Planned what?"

"Don't play stupid, Itachi, you know what I mean."

"Really Naruto, I don't."

"Right, so the whole, 'I don't deal with kids' speech to get me over to visit the night you _paid _Kiba to trap Sasuke into dressing like my every wet-dream on ecstasy—don't even ask how I know, Itachi I just do—then faking an emergency and leaving me to take the candy to my house, _conveniently _when it starts to rain, then accidentally forgetting to leave the spare key for Sasuke thus leaving him no choice but to come to my house where I would molest his horny, sexy, little ass, was all a coincidence?"

"…hn."

"I thought so."

"I don't see why you are complaining."

"I'm not. This is a thank you!"

"Hn."

"I mean, I know you said my birthday present would be late, and that I'd love it, but, damn Itachi I never thought—"

"Twenty-six fifty."

"Huh?"

"Twenty-six fifty."

"Twenty…what are you talking about?"

"Don't be stupid Naruto. You owe me twenty-six fifty."

"…"

"…"

"… for what?"

"For remaining your friend."

"What?"

"For handing you my brother's virgin ass on a silver platter moron. My charge is twenty-six fifty."

"…what the fuck? Are you _pimping _him out?"

"Hn."

"Dear god! What the fuck Itachi? He's your baby brother, I'm your best friend, how could you—"

"Fifty-three."

"You're _doubling_ it? What the… because I'm arguing over your disregard for your brother's body you're—"

"Fifty-three dollars and I'll conveniently forget to tell Sasuke that grandma and grandpa asked me to come out and help them with their wiring next weekend, thus forgetting to pick him up from school as well as locking the spare inside the house again."

"…"

"…"

"… will you accept a check?"

Sasuke walked in the door just in time to see Itachi grin.

**A.N. Wow…. 48 pages. I am tired... I know I edited out the smut from 'Kyuubi The Bitch', but that was because it was multi chaptered fic and if it got deleted for having smut in it, it would be a pain in the ass to repost. This one, though, is a one shot, and that is why I posted it as is. Please review! ^-^ Also, Kudo-points to Danceswithrainbows for noticing that the $26.50, is a refrence to Stephen Lynch's Song (A big thank you to alfa ninja squirrel macadamia for catching my mistake. ^-^ Thank you!), "Best friends". I lay no real claim to the price used, so please don't sue. ^-^ **


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